There's something unsettling with myself for these couple of days. When I felt right, the thing just went wrong. It killed my mood, sort of. For the fact that I do not know what's wrong with my own emotion bothered me too much.
It effects others too.
Best example : Saniy, my nephew.
I got mad for no reason, and he got yelled and of course some cubitan manja because of being himself. Himself = naughtiness that I just could not handle that day. Ended up him crying the lungs out. Alah, typical Saniy kot. Menangis pastu gelak. Memang macam mintak penabuh kan?
After few hours, I felt really bad for me (omg, aku kah?) Haha. Really bad because mak said something to me.
Situation : In the car, on the way to McD
Passengers : Mom & Farris
Driver : Moi
Mak : Saniy, come ikut opah naik kereta.
Saniy : Cakmo, maen fish shark
Me : Tayah bawak. Susah.
Mak : Get through with it. Emosi kenape?
Me : Dunno (muncung)
Mak : He's my cucu, and your own nephew. Bare with it la. He just learn how to talk and frankly he needs time to understand. Marah sangat kenapa?
Me : Dah mak said saniy tu naughty sangat. Not me.
Mak : Yelah, mak je lah salah.
Ok. I felt sooo like crying while driving. T____T
I've ended up musahabah diri sendiri alone in my room, haha seriously. I didnt talk or have any interaction with Saniy at all. Because rasa bersalah ya amat amat.
Even though you are one hella naughty boy, but maksu loves you so much la saniy.
Sorry sebab too garang with you.Sometimes too mean. Sometimes too kejam (ok tipu). Sorry for all the cubitan manja yang maksu bagi kat Saniy. Lain kali please behave ok. You're one good boy and please dont make others mad at you.
Maksu so gonna miss you when you go back to Yangoon.Safa too.
dem, me crying.
T___________________________________________T
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